you can have your sexy back.
Let me start by saying there are about a bajillion other things I could talk about, from relocation, to the bullet holes in the windows my second day on the job (yes, real bullet holes), to a colleague sweet talking me into CrossFit.
But for now, I'm just going to put this out there: I'm giving up on sexy.
The tousled hair. The pouty lips. The seductive stares. I just can't pull it off.
Love 'em or hate 'em, we live in a world of selfies. We also live in this magical digital age where photos can be viewed immediately, approved or discarded, and filtered to alter the reality of bad lighting. Whether for vanity's sake, or just because the contrast looked better, we've all done it. Enter the sexy selfie. I've tried it once or twice (or three times, but only that one time). I'm bee-bopping around and like "Oh, sweet hair day--sexy selfie." Only to find the end result is a facial expression resembling pain or perhaps stomach troubles. And I can totally hear you judging me, just so you know. Am I too old to be dealing with selfies? Of course I am. Give a girl a break, okay? It was an amazing hair day.
And really the whole sexy/seductive thing goes beyond selfies. We're inundated with them. Whether it's magazines targeting women, telling them they're not good enough unless they can pull off pouty lips; or a men's mag promising pouty lips puckering your way if you do x-y-z for washboard abs--we can't escape it. I spent my 20s trying to be serious and be taken seriously. I guess when I lost my third job in 5 years, I got over it. I'm kind of a goofy girl, and that's as sexy as it gets. I like playing dress up, but I'm more a jeans and t-shirt with a ball cap type of person. (Which is impossible in the desert.) I take pride in my appearance, but I'm secretly hoping for a hoodie and boxers and curling up on the couch with a movie. Or...seeing as how I don't have a couch or a TV, I lay on the floor, hope no scorpions attack, and read. My most popular instagram post is a picture of me smothered in an Icelandic mud masque. I'm pretty sure the last thing to cross anyone's mind was "sexy selfie."
And I guess that was kind of the breaking point for me. People like me because I make them laugh.
But for now, I'm just going to put this out there: I'm giving up on sexy.
The tousled hair. The pouty lips. The seductive stares. I just can't pull it off.
Love 'em or hate 'em, we live in a world of selfies. We also live in this magical digital age where photos can be viewed immediately, approved or discarded, and filtered to alter the reality of bad lighting. Whether for vanity's sake, or just because the contrast looked better, we've all done it. Enter the sexy selfie. I've tried it once or twice (or three times, but only that one time). I'm bee-bopping around and like "Oh, sweet hair day--sexy selfie." Only to find the end result is a facial expression resembling pain or perhaps stomach troubles. And I can totally hear you judging me, just so you know. Am I too old to be dealing with selfies? Of course I am. Give a girl a break, okay? It was an amazing hair day.
And really the whole sexy/seductive thing goes beyond selfies. We're inundated with them. Whether it's magazines targeting women, telling them they're not good enough unless they can pull off pouty lips; or a men's mag promising pouty lips puckering your way if you do x-y-z for washboard abs--we can't escape it. I spent my 20s trying to be serious and be taken seriously. I guess when I lost my third job in 5 years, I got over it. I'm kind of a goofy girl, and that's as sexy as it gets. I like playing dress up, but I'm more a jeans and t-shirt with a ball cap type of person. (Which is impossible in the desert.) I take pride in my appearance, but I'm secretly hoping for a hoodie and boxers and curling up on the couch with a movie. Or...seeing as how I don't have a couch or a TV, I lay on the floor, hope no scorpions attack, and read. My most popular instagram post is a picture of me smothered in an Icelandic mud masque. I'm pretty sure the last thing to cross anyone's mind was "sexy selfie."
And I guess that was kind of the breaking point for me. People like me because I make them laugh.
So there you have it. Sorry everyone. So over sexy.
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